Everyone Lies

Should we go through life believing everyone about anything they have to say? I always give people the benefit of the doubt, believeing them until they prove they are untrustworthy.

When D told me he only smoked pot and took pain pills, I believed him. I can remember talking to him about OC's and how I knew some people that were addicted to them and had started shooting them up and he seemed shocked that I talked about it with him, as if I was beating around the bush to ask if he did that. He said he never touched that stuff, even reached out his arms saying, "look I dont have any tread marks on me!".  He seemed so serious, and passionate about not having anything to do with needles, and so I believed what he said.

While D was in Jail, I confronted him about all the stories his family & friends told me about his drug use, he admitted he had problems with it in his past but now that I was in his life he had a reason to do better. He claimed being in jail was giving him a clean slate, a fresh start and he wanted to do right, so that I would stick around. I told him if he went back to the drugs I would leave so, he promised to stay clean and get a job and take care of me. Once again, I believed him. I thought D's family members were my friends. I trusted them all, and believed the stories they told. I felt bad for most of their own situations. Everyone seemed to have a bad background that lead to the bad lifestyle they were living. They portrayed themselves as victoms in some way.

These are just two circumstances that shows me as the victom. This has not always been the case. I have told many lies to many people myself. Never have I purposely told a lie to hurt someone, however, just the opposite. When I am aware that I am about to tell a lie, my mind is telling myself that it is to prevent this person from being hurt by me. This is my own way of making it ok to lie.

When I kept it a secret from jamie about my one night stand that could have potientially been the father of Mackensi, I thought I was protecting him from feeling a pain that could have been averted. When I lied about how long I was going to hang out with my friends at the bar, it was so that Jamie would be more willing to let me go, and when I told Jamie I wanted a divorce and left him saying I was unhappy, instead of telling him I found love in someone else, again I didnt want to hurt him no more than I had to.

Everyone  Lies, some people may not Lie as often or as big as others but I know everyone lies. Its in our nature. Witholding the truth, is also considered lying. Small, "white lies", are still Lies.

 I feel that sometimes lies are told because we dont want to disappoint or hurt anyone. I do know from past experiences that some people will tell lies that come from no where, with no point. I cant speak for these people, what they are feeling or thinking, I cant explain why everyone lies. I can only speak for myself.