I guess now that my personal blog has gone viral, and my very first blog written doesn't exactly explain anything about ME, I will take the time to give you a little background about JUST ME & Why I BLOG! As if my title and description are not enough, I thought some of you might would be interested in knowing who in the word is this crazy chick!? So, without further a dew...
Welcome to the world of ~ TIFFANY ~ where sometimes I make no sense, but to me I make perfect sense! I have very few friends, not because I am not likable, but more so because most people just don't understand me. Some people say I am stupid, some say I have no common sense, and those that know me best will say I am a little out there. In some ways, all are true. I sometimes say & do some of the most stupid things, those are the times when I learn, about myself, about other people, & about life in general. If you cant ever do something stupid & laugh at yourself for it then you are just too fucking uptight! Life is too short to be serious 24/7! As far as common sense, I got cheated! I am book smart! I have 3.75 GPA in college (ok, this is from 2007 but it still counts!). When it comes to being crazy, that's a given! In February 2011 a team of doctors & psychologist determined that I have Bipolar Disorder. I've yet to believe them, I honestly think it's just called L*I*F*E
I was brought into this world 28 years ago (As of July 13), before my third birthday my parents divorced and for reasons beyond my knowledge my father was granted custody of me. My mother moved to Florida where she met her husband & they lived their lives, while I grew up with my Father & Step-mom. Together they had two other children, my half siblings. We lived in a poverty stricken town, and yes, we were poor! My dad & step-mom were common law married until I turned 11 years old, then they separated. Realizing he had no idea how to raise a pre-teen, my father made contact with my mom & sent me to live with her.
For three years I stayed in Florida and in that time I learned that my mom was a drug addict. At one point, she caught me crying in my room and after finding out that I was upset by seeing her smoke pot and snort pills she explained to me that she had been this way her whole life and she wasn't about to stop for anybody, and that included me. Growing up without my mom was very hard for me, but I somehow managed to paint a portrait of this wonderful fairy tail like person, so you can imagine the heart break I felt when I realized she was no where near like the type of mom I dreamed of all those years.
After learning my step-father's job was going to have us move for the third time in three years & this time all the way to Texas, I told my mother I didn't want to go & asked could she try to locate my Dad. I knew there was more to life for me than what she was able to offer. So, after locating my dad & moving back home I spent the remainder of my teen years back in Alabama with my Father.
I thought I had it made, my dad is a musician (he always has been, even since before I was born!) and so he spent his weekends playing in his band at bars in town, leaving me at home alone. I got into a little bit of trouble with boys during the next two years, but let's face it; What would you expect of your 14/15 year old daughter? Anyhow, less than two years went by before my dad met the woman that to this day I call my step-mom. She is 4 years older than me. At first I thought this was going to be awesome, a mom that could relate to me! Uh NO, just the opposite, she would try to make friends with 'my friends' and even flirted with my boyfriends (in complete denial), plus so many other things that happened. Our closeness in ages ultimately caused a strain on my dad's relationship with me.
With things at home being very intense, I moved out when I was 17 years old. I moved in with my mother's baby sister, my aunt & her family (husband & three kids). I lived in her basement. She (with her husbands help & the help from my grandmother) helped me get my drivers license, a car, and a job. I worked, finished my senior year of school, then after two years went by, God sent me an Angel. I met my husband.
In the past 8 years we have been together, we have had a lot of ups and downs. The most difficult thing we have went through was our separation. I created my blog to put a stop to rumors that were circulating among my husbands family & friends & even between some of my own regarding what caused me to just up and leave him and my girls in October 2010. I was living in a meth house, with several drug addicts, one of which was my boyfriend whom I left my husband to be with. I was living there for four months and during that time I was faced with some of the hardest decisions of my life to date. After finally agreeing to leave that environment, my family & husband concluded that either I was mentally insane or using drugs myself.
After passing a drug test, the doctors decided that I needed to be medically evaluated for a mental disorder, which later would be determined that I have Bipolar Disorder. (I'm in complete denial about this!) It is my opinion that i was not "going crazy" I was merely experiencing L*I*F*E and hit a breaking point. Even though that chapter in my life is over, I still find Blogging to be soothing, and a good stress relief. I like to keep things real. I blog about issues within my personal life. I discuss things that most people are too scared or embarrassed to talk about. One of my followers called me "CANDID" the other day, & i was uncertain as to it's meaning so I had to look it up. This word is absolutely a perfect fit for my personality & who I am.
The way I see it.....I am nothing more or nothing less than Who I AM: Candid -frank; outspoken; open and sincere, free from reservation, disguise, or subterfuge;straightforward: a candid opinion.
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