Three strikes

Having to sit back and keep quiet while watching my 2 year old cry to go with her sister to her nanna's house, is heart breaking. Hurting my feelings is one thing, but when it comes to hurting my children that is a line you just don't cross without consequences. I've given several chances to wait for Nancy to stay true to her word when she claimed she would spend more time with Madi, but she always failed to follow through.

My hubs has never gotten involved with the drama between me and Nancy. He just likes to ignore issues and hope they go away. I tried to tell him she would only get worse throughout the years and with situations like this, i do not gloat when i am right. There were many heated arguments on the phone between the two of us, and I can remember trying to get the hubs to pick up the other phone to listen in so he could see how crazy she was, but it only back fired with him saying I started the whole mess. It wasn't until recently that it became apparent that the problem was Nancy and not me.

I had my first argument with Nancy before the summer break. At this time, kensi was still attending concord and therefore Nancy wanted to get her several days after school and wanted her to spend the night. Considering I had just came back home after our 4 month separation, I was still trying to win over the family so I didn't push the issue, I just simply would ask when did she think she could spend some time with Madi. She would promise to get her some but of course never did. At the end of the school year she claimed that she would get both girls some during the summer to give me a break. She kept kensi a lot of course, but Madison only went on occasions, when the hubs or i specifically asked her to babysit so we could go do something. Like always, Madi was never allowed to spend the night. The summer ended and I was annoyed by her lack of time spent with Madi versus the enormous time spent with kensi.

Our second major argument came when my hubs and I decided to move kensi from concord school to our own school zone of mcadory. There was an issue of whether we would make it as a couple, or mainly was I going to go manic again and just up and leave. Keeping these in mind his mother and nancy argued us till they were blue in the face that kensi needed to stay in concord. I argued with the hubs several points as to why it was beneficial for her to transfer. Nancy and hubs mother made it a battle of me versus them when it was all supposed to be for the best interest of kensi's future. The battle ended with kensi's being transferred. This upset nancy more than anyone. She was so upset because she knew she wouldn't have as much access to kensi any more. I admit, I made things worse when I told hubs I wanted ground rules: #1 being NO SLEEPOVERS ON SCHOOL NIGHTS with nancy OR his mom. I wanted our family to be as normal as possible and it would have been too hectic letting this continue to happen. (The main reason I hated this to happen is b/c anytime nancy would keep kensi after school, her School Clothes never came home, her art work didn't come home, important notes were taken out of her binder and put up on nancy's fridge, and I missed out on knowing what was going on at school b/c of all of this) So, I felt I had good reasons, and more importantly the hubs agreed with me. Like always, I slipped up a few times and gave in to their begging and kensi's crying. I set rules and then I feel bad so I give in. --Wish I could take that back!--

The third argument was just back in September. I honestly do not remember exactly what happened but I can tell you that she ticked me and the hubs off really badly. September 1st is Kensi's birthday. September 25th is Madi's birthday. We had their birthday party together in the middle of the month to save on money, but we also did something separately to make kensi still feel special. Two days before her birthday, on Tuesday night Nancy asked to take kensi to her dance class to spend time with her, of course we said sure. When she returned, kensi had a large bag of toys from target and was crying to spend the night, only b/c it was her birthday, we said ok. Two days later we took her out to dinner at olive garden where she received more gifts from nancy. Then at her actual party, she received even more gifts. I added the amount of money spent on kensi to be around $400. At the party Nancy had two gifts for madi, totalled maybe $40-$60 & this upset me very badly.

 It was at this time that the hubby started to notice how much of a difference she was making and we discussed it was time to put an end to it. Actually, it was more of like, I DEMANDED she no longer be allowed to treat madi this way.

& So the battle began.